Yet one more Thanksgiving will come and go tomorrow. I’ve had 65 of them so far, and I can remember bits and pieces of many of them. I remember loaded tables, cooking for hours and despite being very tired, being happy that what I was doing blessed my family. Turkey or ham, homemade rolls, potatoes sweet and mashed, gravy from scratch, green beans, pumpkin pies, cakes and cookies. I loved this holiday just for the tremendous amount of cooking I got to do! The kids laughing and arguing, watching movies, making their own memories. Saying grace and telling the Lord we were so thankful for the gifts He gives us, every single day, not just this one. Sitting at the table sometimes, and sometimes everyone just spreading out on the couch, the floor, or whatever suited them.

Nowadays, it is just he and I, the house is quiet, we’ll have some kind of a meal, we always do 🙂 We’ll probably eat too much, because, well….it’s traditional. Watch a movie or two. Maybe take a drive if it’s a nice day, go to the lake and let the dogs run. Check our social media and see how our friends spent their day. I’m thankful. We’re not alone. We’ve had a friend invite us to their house for the day, but we decline. It’s really just too hard to be around a family that we’re not a part of, wishing we had ours, wishing things were different. There’s a lot of folks out there that are alone today, and if they are, they are probably lonely and hurting. Take a moment, drop them a message, offer to bring them some pie or whatever. Let them know even though there is pain in their heart, they are being thought of, they are still cared for, still loved, no matter their circumstances. And if they decline a visit, know it’s not you. They are too raw, they don’t want to ruin your day and they aren’t part of your family, and sometimes that is just harder to bear than being alone.

If you are one of those families that are hectic, going here and there, seeing those you love and some you don’t so much, relish it. Tired moms out there, delegate, bring the kids into the kitchen with you and enjoy their help, no matter how misguided it will be sometimes. The days are long, but the years are short, and gradually everything will change. The noise of the holidays can be deafening, but so can the silence. Some of those people you spend time with now will be gone next year, or the year after. Love them today. There’s no guarantee of a tomorrow.

And most of all, have a blessed Thanksgiving no matter what stage of life you are in.

Sitting on the porch in the pre-dawn, sipping on my coffee and listening to the world wake up.  A rooster crows in the distance while much closer the crickets and cicadas rival each other for noise.  A large spider hangs on his web outside of the porch, seemingly weightless, hovering in mid-air.  A bob white calls from a field not far from here.  The answer comes from what sounds like a lot farther away.  There is a white haze, almost a fog but not quite, over the pasture across the road.  The sun is just beginning to break over the horizon,  and I remember it is supposed to be 103* here today.  As a cow makes a warbly, weird bellow nearby, I wonder how the animals can bear this, day after day, yet they do.  No choice, I guess.  Another sip of coffee, time to get this day going…..

Let’s take a ride down memory lane, to a time when things were simpler. Just picture, 60 or 70 years ago when this bike was shiny and new, some youngster would be pedaling as fast as their legs could go. A little girl with her braids flying behind her and her skirt flapping in the wind, or perhaps a boy with a crew cut and rolled up jeans and tennies, their best friend standing on the step behind them, urging them to go faster, faster! A time when Dad’s word was law, Mom’s cookies were a treat, eating out was rare, and best friends pinky swearing to keep each other’s secrets. “Go play” was the best sentence ever, and dragging in tired and hungry when the street lights went on just to find Mom made your favorite food….those were the days, my friend.
Take some time and share a part of yourself and your memories with someone today. I’m sure there are some really good ones!

It’s 5:30 in the morning, sitting on the porch in the cool semi darkness with a cup of hot coffee.  It is quiet until the coyotes in the far distance call to each other.  Slowly the world begins to wake up as the sun gets closer to breaking over the horizon.  Birds, with different calls and songs, greet the day with their usual optimism.  An owl hoots nearby and another answers in the distance. The cows quietly move through the tall grass across the road in the field, occasionally mooing but mostly just grazing on the cool dewy grasses.  Charlie fancies he hears something I don’t, and lumbers his 100 pound frame over to the bench, putting his front paws on the seat and having a look around through the screened windows.  Satisfied there is no threat, he comes back and lays down near my feet where he is sure to get petted.  A rooster down the road crows, and is answered by a rooster up the road a ways.  The yard light seems to flicker, but it’s just a little breeze causing the leaves from the oak tree to move in front of it.  The hummingbirds have found the newly filled feeders and are starting their day on a sweet note.  I hope the ants which seem to plague those same feeders no matter what we do, find something else to eat today.  The morning is light even though the sun still hasn’t topped the horizon, the air is fresh, and it’s time for another cup of coffee.

The sun isn’t up yet as she makes her first cup of coffee.  Quietly, so as not to wake her husband, she walks into the livingroom and sits in her favorite chair by the window.  From here she can see the sun rise.  It seems every day she has the same thoughts as she sits here, but seem to be more intense around Christmas….and every other holiday. The silence of the house echo’s her thoughts.  Her mind travels from what she wished for but never will have, family gathered around.  Grandchildren she could have watched grow up.  Her now adult children talking about things that interest them, including remember when.  Instead they pretty much don’t even talk to each other, and two of them don’t talk to her either.  It will never be, and once again her heart aches with a pain that only those who have endured this can know.  She sighs, picks up her cup and takes a sip.  It’s tolerable hot and feels good warming her on this cold day.  The light is ever so slowly creeping up the horizon silhouetting the trees bare branches in the distance.  Her thoughts move on to those she has lost both recently and long ago.  How she longs to be able to see them once more, to hug them, to feel the sense of being a part of them.  They were saved and she knows she will see them in Heaven, but there is such a huge chasm between where they are and where she is.  Their passing leaves her lonelier than before but it’s a pain she bears every day. Much like when a tree has a wound, it just scars over it and makes it a part of who it is, that’s the way it has grown on her.  Cars travel by on the country road in front of her house.  She wonders what the people in them do.  What are their lives like?  She checks her phone, remembering that one friend has family coming in today and she knows she will be excited.  She sends them a quick text to let them know she is happy for them.  Another friend is going through cancer so she sends her an encouraging note.  Hopefully it helps.  Another friend is going through the holidays having lost a son, she sends a prayer to them that their heart be at peace.  Other friends are just going about their day to day with nothing much new and she sends a few of them a “good morning” meme, wishing them a good day.  That accomplished it’s time for another cup of coffee.  Blessings, like the coffee every morning begin to filter though the heavy sadness that still grips her heart. Other blessings, like the dogs who faithfully stay near her.  She smiles as one of them lays down near near her, his head on her foot.  Her husband is beginning to stir as the sun peeks it’s head over the horizon.  He’s another blessing, a huge one.  He suffers with the same heart pain she does yet keeps on keeping on.  She says a quick prayer for him this morning.  The sun has made it’s full appearance and it’s time for that second cup of coffee.  The day moves on and so must she.  Perhaps she will find someone to give her latest crochet project to.  It makes her heart happy to give to others, and perhaps there is something she can do today that would bless them.  With that thought in mind, she gets up from her chair while removing her foot from under the dog, heads to the kitchen for her coffee as she hears her husband say, “Good morning, honey”. 

It’s going to be a good day.

With Mother’s Day just a couple days away, I wanted to share some of my photography, but also a note. Many mother’s have been estranged from their children and this day is so difficult. They don’t talk about it because the stigma they feel (what did I do wrong, was I a bad parent, etc.) is strong and painful. The hurt is unexplainable and deep, as though grieving a death when there has been none. They watch other’s with their families and ache, wishing for the same, or some semblance of a relationship. Although we all know that mother’s day is largely a commercialized holiday any more, the reminders are everywhere of what they will not be getting….the love of the person they gave life to and did the best they could for. I am one of those mothers.
To those who are in this club we didn’t ask membership to, I pray for your day to be one where you see new blessings in your life, not old pain.

In 1850, Nathaniel Hawthorne wrote the book, The Scarlet Letter. It was about a woman who had an adulterous affair, bore a child from it, and was forced by the community to wear the letter “A” on the front of her bodice for all to see. As if they didn’t know anyway, it was after all 1850 and gossip was the first line of communication in a village. I could go into how that was a really crappy way to treat someone, or how I recall a Bible story about a woman caught in the same sin and the guy was also mysteriously not named (but Jesus forgave her, and didn’t force her to wear her shame in front of everyone), and on an on, but I won’t. But I really want to.

Today, in 2020 we are coming close to doing the same thing except this time it’s the letter C. Call it covid 19 or call it coronavirus, either way it’s causing the same type of ostracism as Hester Prynne received over 200 years ago, on a much wider scale. We evidently don’t have the flu, colds, allergies or any other kind of diseases anymore, just the ‘rona. Cough in public? It’s like dropping dishsoap into greasy water, the entire area suddenly opens up so you and your toxic germs can be alone. Sneeze? Same results. Don’t wear a mask? You hate everyone and you are selfish. Wear a mask? You are now one of the many blinded to the conspiracy that is creeping through our country. Stay home and quarantine? You are setting yourself up for getting sick because your immunity will be down. Get out there and live life despite it all? How dare you possibly carry germs from point A to point B and beyond? Laugh and joke about it? Be serious, this is a dangerous thing and kills even more people than death does. Be super serious about it? Refer to the suicide rate that has exploded in the past year. Perhaps the next step will be to give everyone who has had this a large C to wear so everyone will know. Or maybe they should give out the letter “S” for scared.

Even better, let’s give out kudos for everyone that shuts off their social networks, online news and the internet for a day or ten or more and re-enters the real world that has living human beings instead of social profiles. Let’s give another star for those who reach out and do kindnesses for others just because they can, not to add ”likes” or to gather a larger audience for their blog or whatever other venue they use. Add to that finding the common sense we’ve put aside to be part of the pseudo-family we’ve created with online people that we’ve mostly never even met, but yet allow them to define what our values and morals are, compromising our beliefs in a trade for acceptance.

We are in the middle of yet one more challenge in life. It’s up to you how you respond to it, whether with common sense and courtesy, or with fear, anger and frantic antics. Choose wisely, for what we sow we will reap.

Be well. Be kind. Be wise.

Isaiah 26:3

Our dogs, Chester and Charlie, without realizing it nor caring have taught me a lot about life, “why did that happen”, and consequences. For instance, we were camping out on a piece of land we own. I always worry that the dogs are going to come across something that could hurt them, such as a rattlesnake, badger or coyotes but my dogs? They don’t care. They run, bark, have fun, romp in weeds that I would steer clear of. That morning I had let them out of the camper to do their usual “race as fast as they could everywhere barking and just being happy they are alive” thing. As I looked out the window to the west (they were romping to the east) I saw something that made me frantically call them back in before they saw it. It was a badger! Not known for their kind and loving disposition, but for their fighting spirit, claws and teeth there was danger ahead. Dude was just waddling along, minding his own business, headed for bed in the old house foundation we haven’t dealt with yet, and I didn’t want my dogs who love to chase rabbits (never successfully) to think this was just a rabbit of another color! Dogs were obviously disappointed to be called in so quickly, but for their safety it had to be done. It made me think of times in my life where I thought everything was hunky dory, all seemed good, I was getting to do whatever my little heart desired and boom….the Lord shut it down. Maybe seeing the ‘badger’ in my future was the reason? Sometimes you just have to trust that the right decision was made for you despite how confusing and occasionally irritating it seems. My dogs did.